Teen Pregnancy: The Tangled Web, Part 3

A DIFFERENT WEB: This line of inquiry leads to what may be the single most important concept that cuts through the web of factors influencing teen pregnancy: if children are to develop the skills they will need to make responsible decisions as teens, they require the support and concern of involved adults who are committed to nurturing, teaching and guiding them from infancy through adolescence and into adulthood. Unfortunately, even with two parents they might not be guaranteed this basic requirement, and even seemingly perfect families encounter challenges. This is where extended family and community relationships become important. Perhaps, in this sense, it really does take a village to raise a child. After all, even when adults become parents they need physical help, emotional support and a high capacity for personal resilience and self-sacrifice. Ideally, parenthood would not be undertaken alone, and especially not by someone too young to handle the stressful demands that come with the territory. It's not only the welfare of the young single mother at stake. When young mothers don't understand the needs of infants or have difficulty meeting those needs because they lack sufficient support, the crucial bond that needs to be created between parent and infant suffers. As a result, the next generation may also find itself looking for acceptance through risky behavior. For this reason, when all preventive measures have failed, says Hoffman, "it's very important not to make these girls pariahs." With a new life to be concerned for, the family's obligation is as binding as ever. One can only hope that in such a case families and communities would turn their collective attention to weaving a web of support to provide for the physical and emotional needs of the newest family member. And attention is the key word. As Albert points out, there are certain stories teens desperately need to hear, and it's never too late for parents to tell these stories. "Sometimes after a teenager experiences one pregnancy, she ends up pregnant again within the next couple of years," says Hoffman. "And then pregnant again after that-not necessarily marrying the father, or even setting up a household with the father or fathers. So the story isn't over once a teen gets pregnant the first time. There is still a need for education." Sometimes, perhaps, parents need to be educated as much as teens. In any case, it seems Albert has sliced through to the core of the problem: as parents, we need to become better at telling our children the important stories, and telling them often. Stories about goals and aspirations, values and expectations-realities and truths about the consequences of poor choices. As those stories are told, the unspoken message teens will hear is that they are important enough to parents to warrant the investment of their time. By: GINA STEPP gina.stepp@visionjournal.org Source: www.vision.org SELECTED REFERENCES: 1 Robert Coles, ed., The Erik Erikson Reader (2000). 2 Stanley Coopersmith, The Antecedents of Self-Esteem (1967). 3 Annette U. Rickel, Teen Pregnancy and Parenting (1989). 4 Lee SmithBattle, "Gaining Ground From a Family and Cultural Legacy: A Teen Mother's Story of Repairing the World," in Family Process (Vol. 47. No. 4, 2008). 5 Jane Waldfogel, What Children Need (2006).