How to Deal With Being a Gifted Student, Part 1

The natural trajectory of giftedness in childhood is not a six-figure salary, perfect happiness, and a guaranteed place in Who's Who. It is the deepening of the personality, the strengthening of one's value system, the creation of greater and greater challenges for oneself, and the development of broader avenues for expressing compassion. - Dr. Linda K. Silverman. Being a gifted student is never easy, but since you are extraordinary, you will be able to navigate well even as you swim upstream against a culture which does not necessarily value your gifts. People will always consider you "the smart kid", no matter how hard you try to fit in. But you can learn how to avoid inadvertently alienating your friends and other students by being happy with yourself. Steps: 1. Understand what being gifted really means. Some would say it means to be intelligent, which is true, if you have a broad definition of intelligence. A gifted student will not always be at the top of the class in every subject. Extraordinary talents are not limited to "book smarts" but can also be expressed through art, athletics, communication, mechanics, etc. Being gifted also means that in the area in which you are gifted, you have exceptional reasoning abilities and be able to learn more quickly than others. 2. Make the most of your time in school. Remember that school, even for those placed in so-called "gifted classes", will not necessarily be an enriching environment. After all, performance in school can be tied quite closely to interest in the subject, and some gifted individuals feel restricted by the teaching format of modern school systems. The subjects might not be fulfilling. You may be bored, and sit in the back of the class and sleep or daydream. You may feel that you just do not fit in. However, just as is true of other students, you may find some classes give you the opportunity of learning exciting and new things. Ultimately, it is your responsibility to make the most of your gifts. 3. Avoid unrealistic expectations for yourself. Expect that you may not be good at everything just because you are gifted. In fact, many gifted students have very low grades due to being improperly challenged in school. Others may have a straight-A average and perfect attendance through high school, but couldn't throw a football or turn a cartwheel to save their lives. Recognize where your talents lie, and set your expectations accordingly - don't beat yourself up for not being automatically gifted in every aspect of life. There are some things you're good at, and some things you're not: in both cases, focus on building on what you already have. 4. Steer away from mentioning your gifted status if you think your friends and acquaintances will have trouble understanding. Your peers may have the urge to compare and compete, and may not understand that you aren't trying to "beat" them. When a teacher calls you aside to talk about your extremely high quiz grade, you don't have to draw attention to it if you don't wish to. If someone asks you about it, you can choose to be mysterious and then to change the subject to something you have in common. If someone asks about your grade on a test, and you know that most of your class thought the test was hard, you can say "everyone always has room for improvement" or remind them of a test in another subject that they did much better in than you. If you feel like you're being pressured to divulge your achievements, remember that your performance is your business, and no one in your class is entitled to know how well you're doing, especially if they're going to take it personally. 5. Be proud of all your assets, including (but not limited to) your intelligence. You don't have to show off in order to be proud of yourself, but you don't have to "play dumb" either. Others around you can cope with the fact that you have a brain, just as you all cope with the fact that the school quarterback has a talent for sports, and star status. No one is going to expect the head cheerleader to keep her jumping ability secret. If it is not shameful to be a star in sports, then you can certainly be proud of your intellectual abilities and accomplishments. 6. Life is particularly hard if you are moved up a school year or two, and worse if you have to switch between your two classes. It is much harder not to stand out because everybody will know. You do have the right to say you would prefer to remain with your own peers, and remember this will not affect your chances for higher education and beyond at all - in fact, it will give you more time to build up a great CV. However, if you are becoming very bored with lessons, you should make sure something is done about it. 7. Do your best to look like a regular kid. Notice what others kids are wearing, and wear similar things, so long as you don't change yourself too much to be like them. Remember your individuality is important. 8. Tell the truth, even when you do not know the answer. Never brag about your knowledge, as this might alienate others before they ever get to really know you. Just be yourself, and discuss things naturally and to the best of your ability. Through conversation about books, specific interests or hobbies, others will naturally get to know you and your abilities. 9. Try not to become obsessed with grades. You are not expected to get an A in every subject every day! Since there is a big difference between gifted children and children who do well in school, just remember that deep understanding of subjects that interest you will take you far in life. Your goal needs to be mastery, not perfect grades. 10. Refrain from teasing others because they might have to work harder at school, or for any other reason. If you make jokes about the fact that your friend stayed up all night studying for what you thought was the easiest test all year, you could hurt someone's feelings. 11. Enjoy being smart because that is who you are! Be the best you can be, and always be true to yourself, gifted but normal in every way. 12. Find ways to bond with others. Because you're gifted, it's not as easy for you to relate to your peers, but you can still develop friendships in a variety of ways: * Find an activity that many people enjoy, and in which your abilities are at the same level as everyone else's. You may be a math whiz, for example, but on the soccer field you're just like everyone else. If so, get involved with soccer so that you can bond with your peers without your gifts complicating things. * Look for other gifted students who take interests in the same things you do. If you are an extraordinary violinist, make friends with another gifted violinist. Practice together and discuss your performance. * Find a mentor who is gifted. They can offer advice, experience and wisdom from having lived much longer than you have, not only as a gifted student but also as a gifted adult. 13. Bond with your classmates. They get you. They understand how your mind works. They are going through the same things you are. These people are more alike to you than any other people. If you come half way through the year, or if you come a few years late, the first thing you will notice is how close the class is. They will consider themselves siblings, or at least very close to. You will learn to depend on these people. They will become like a huge family to you. You may not believe it, but within 2 weeks, you will love being gifted. 14. Help those less intelligent than you. Having some less intelligent friends and helping them achieve is something they won't forget soon. This is the best way to replace envy by appreciation and avoid being bullied. originated by: Horses4Ever, KnowItSome, Sondra C, Rob S Source: www.wikihow.com